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poem
Message de i_blue posté le 27-05-2006 à 13:44:49 (S | E | F | I)
Hello everyone, I have written this small poem and I want that you would like you to give me your observations and thank you for all .
Can you change the world for better,
and make me stronger,
when Im feeling younger,
when I see your smile older,
and
when I listenat your speech nicer.
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Modifié par bridg le 27-05-2006 13:47
Message de i_blue posté le 27-05-2006 à 13:44:49 (S | E | F | I)
Hello everyone, I have written this small poem and I
Can you change the world for better,
and make me stronger,
when Im feeling younger,
when I see your smile older,
and
when I listenat your speech nicer.
-------------------
Modifié par bridg le 27-05-2006 13:47
Réponse: poem de bridg, postée le 27-05-2006 à 14:47:00 (S | E)
I meet some issues with your poem but it's yours and it's too hard to give you a new proposition.
From your few lines I had a mind to write another one for the mothers feast, just for the fun.
Could you make this world better?
Could you make me stronger?
I don't know but..
I feel so young by seeing you just near
I'll never forget you my mother.
Réponse: poem de babyscot59, postée le 27-05-2006 à 15:18:18 (S | E)
Wonder rhymes with Tender
like the one you give to me
Love rhymes with Dove
Like the peace you bring to me
Care rhymes with Nightmares
like the one you appease in the night
Fairy rhymes with a bed story
That you tell me when the night comes
Réponse: poem de i_blue, postée le 27-05-2006 à 15:57:01 (S | E)
I thank you bridg for your proposals, it is the first poem that I write and I wish to continue,the important is to have some imagination and to benefit from it to write. do you share my opinion?
Réponse: poem de bridg, postée le 27-05-2006 à 16:05:18 (S | E)
Hello
You want to write? It's very important for you, do it. Everybody need to express their feeling, some will take the sportive way, others will take a paper. The most important is to keep pleasure.
Réponse: poem de nora89, postée le 02-07-2006 à 23:38:30 (S | E)
hello..
I would like to congratulate you..yes.. your poem
especially if it is your first attempt..really I like your poem and writing it's also my way to express my feelings. Do not
good luck
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Modifié par bridg le 02-07-2006 23:41
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